MTN Nigeria Selfcare App - Android Apps on Google Play https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.comviva.mtnnigeriaselfcare (Shared from UC Browser)
Thursday, 30 May 2013
FUNNY POSTS ON FACEBOOK
"Be magnified Oh Lord, you are highly exhausted"X_X "thank you Lord 4 a brown new day" Lol...Y
MESSI'S GIRLFRIEND
Messi's girlfriend was trying to wake Messi this morning. In the process, she said, "Messi, Messi, its 8!" Messi replied: "They scored again?" Girlfriend: "No, it's 8am. Time for training
AKPOS STUDENT CALLED OBI
UuObi: who has no wife, no child, no money, no home, a blind mother, infact very very poor. But one day he saw a magician who promised to grant him only one wish. Magician : Tell me one thing u wish, and i will do it for u right now. Obi: OK, no problem, I have only one wish, I want my mother to see my wife caring two of my kids in my Hummer jeep parked near the swimming pool in one of my many mansion’s situated at London city. The magician fainted. "describe Obi in one word"
IT HAS TO STOP
What Nonsense! This has gat to stop! . When CL0SE-UP does an advert, they will show you someone's teeth and how to brush properly. When GILETTE Does an advert they will show you someone's beards, armpit and they will show you how well the shaving stick works. When DETTOL does an advert they will show you someone taking his or her bath in the bathroom with the soap ........... ......But what the hell is wrong with ALWAYS ULTRA Sanitary PAD? When they are doing their advert they will never show us anything! All we see is a girl rolling on her bed or secondary school girls singing in the field... How does that show us what the pad is used for? where is the pad going to na? Nawa o! I tire for una advert o!!
#BRAIN TEASER#
#BRAIN TEASER# X is a seven letters word,X is impossible for God.New babies like X better than breast milk,the poor have X and the rich looking for X from the poor.If u eat X you will die,X is more important than your life.I swear with my life,I will give you X if you get the answer. What is X?
INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT HUMAN
Interesting facts about human body : > Men lose about 40 hairs in a day and women lose 70 hairs in a day. > Your blood has same amount of salts in it as an ocean has. > You are taller in the morning than you are at night. > Heart circulates blood in your body about 1000 times each day. > Eyelashes last about 150 days. > There are 500 hairs in an eyebrow. > The average human body contains approximately 100 billion nerve cells. > It is not possible to sneeze with open eyes. > Bones are 4 times stronger than concrete. > Average life span of a taste bud is only 10 days. > You are born without knee caps and they don’t appear until age of 2 to 6 years. > Children grow faster in springtime. > Eyes stay the same size throughout life but nose and ears never stop growing. > We born with 300 bones but end upwith 206 bones when we are adult. > Human skull is made up of 26 different bones. > Hair is made of same substance as fingernails. > Our entire body functions stop when we sneeze, even your heart beat. > Tongue is the strongest muscle in human body. > Typical person goes to bathroom six times a day. > Food takes 7 seconds to reach stomach from mouth. > Children have more taste buds than adults. > Sneeze blows air out of nose at the speed of 100 miles per hour. > Largest muscle in your body is one on which you are sitting on. > Smallest bone of body is in ears
CRUSADE
CRUSADE! CRUSADE!! CRUSADE!!! DORTMUND Christian Ministry in conjunction with BAYERN Crusaders Church invites you all to a 2-day power packed crusade, tagged 'DESTROYING ALL SPANISH GIANTS & GOLIATH: Part 2''. FEATURING: 1. Breaking of curses (El Clasico) 2. Freedom from powers (Platini) 3. Humilation of Pride (Jose Mourinho) 4. Overpowering Principalities (Lionel Messi) 5. Achieving Ur Destiny & reaching your goals (Wembley) Host Pastor:Rev Robert Lewandoski. MINISTERING: Rev Pastor & Elder Arjen Robben, Apostle Thomas Mueller, Pastor Marco Reus & other Anointed Men of Soccer. Ushering Units:Messi and Ronaldo. Come for a power packed display as all Giants will be knocked out of your life forever. COME ONE, COME ALL!!!
Pes 2013 cheat
ge loads to your satisfaction then you press (r1+r2)instantly.it dummies the keeper. Easy money in master league In mid-season (transfer season January), negotiate contract with the newcomers as much as you can. make sure you make a 1-year contract on this players. In the pre-season (transfer season June-July), when the newcomers ask for a contract renewal, just give them the salary as high as possible. max salary is $75,000,000. In the next season, release these players. you wil get a total of $100,000,000. Easy penalty When 1 on 1 make autho stop the keeper will sweep your legs off Easy win match By c.Rolando First start any match.Then go to options and select player settings. Then select your opposition team by changing it.Then go back to the match score many own goals the do this trick again to go back to your own team and have fun seeing your opposition in much danger and win the match easily! :> Fack short Box and x Fake shot Press square then x FLIP FLAP tricks Hold L1 and then press the left or right direction For FLIP FLAP TRICKS Press R1 while holding arrow keys FREE KICKS FROM LONG RANGE Call the second player(r1+l1),let him set the ball(l1+x). while holding up direction gauge your shot and press triangle immediately Free kick Hold down, left or right depending on where you want to place it, hold X. Then gauge your shot. Having a serious injury to opponent R2+r1+r2 the same time Heavy score Press square then r2 quickly by Salley He loops it Tap bo* any direction you want, hold R1, release and hold R1 again quickly when the goal keeper is moving towards you How to lay crossing down When reaching the corner kick side press o 3 times and block immediately and your player will come for the ball How to off ur game with ur pad U wil hav to use analog pad to put off d gam wit your pad by holding al d keys including your analog rotation den d gam wil off bt d arrow keys nd d x,box.circle nd triangle ar also nt dier How to score free kick in winning eleven If you got it from right side near box 18 use right foot player and tap the left direction key three time then press circle a litle bit and if its left use let foot to play it. Jk Press triangle to send a through pass Keeper alerting Speed (r1) + Triangle at once Looping Tap box then hold R1 release and hold R1 quickly when the keeper is moving towards you Move keeper up Hold (triangle) when opponent is coming and goal keeper will run up to him and take the ball Opponent never scores Up,down,right,right,right,up Opponent never score Up,down,right,right,up Placing Block +r2 PLAYING A 1-2 Press r2 after passing the ball Score 100 goles Up,block,down,circle 10 times enjoy! Score corner kick Up,up,up,up,right Score ten goals Up,right, right,up,left,down Score ten goals Up,right,right,up,left,down SCORING BEST GOALS--Klint When reaching the middle line after your side and your with a player that has a high accuracy in shot,guage your box 2 the post nd its a goal.......ENJOY!..........! By:klint Scoring frm centre Press box plus l1 quickly by tinky Scoring goals Up,up,down, left,left,right Sure free kick goal When you are on the box 18 line, either in the midle or not far from the middle, direct your shot and tap O at a very little guage and it's a goal. Swabbing When your player is holding ball,press 0+x By wizprince Team overdrive In main menu do the following cheat....up ,down,right,right,down,up,left....ur players in the team you chouse will have all abilities full. THE ULTIMATE NAPSTER SQUARE+r2+CONTROL Tiping over the goal keeper Press L1+square TO GET MALAYSIA IN PES 2012 BUY PES MALAYSIA IN MALAYSIA`S SUPERMRKET OT ASK PES MANA GER TO INCLUDED MALAYSIA IN PES To height the keeper in a close range when you near the keeper you will press box den L1 immediately. To increase defence when opponents want to score Tap R2 and L2 for 7-8 times To make nice and good skills hole To make nice skills hold L2+L1 and place your hand on the direction keys and keep on rolling your hand it and it will
Thursday, 23 May 2013
Tuesday, 21 May 2013
Children of Nigeria vs children of Isreal
If the children of Israel were Nigerians, they would have wasted a whole day at d RED SEA snapping and uploading their BB/FB status like:
~ Chilling with Moses
~ Miracle tinz
~ Red sea turned dry land
~ Moses on point
~ End of Pharaoh etc.
=))º°˚˚˚°ºhahahaº°˚˚˚°º=))
Sunday, 5 May 2013
Saturday, 4 May 2013
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